英语幽默短文带翻译

Sweden in 1962 had only one television channel, which broadcast in black and white. The station's technical expert appeared on the news to announce that thanks to a newly developed technology, viewers could convert their existing sets to receive color pictures by pulling a nylon stocking over the screen.

1962年的瑞典“瞬变彩色电视机"。当时，瑞典只有一个电视频道，而且是黑白的。愚人节那天，电视台技术人员在新闻中宣布，由于最新技术的开发成功，观众们只需将一只尼龙长统袜撑开盖在电视屏幕上，就能使黑白画面立刻变成彩色。

Discover Magazine announced in 1995 that a highly respected biologist, Aprile Pazzo (Italian for April Fool), had discovered a new species in Antarctica: the hotheaded naked ice borer. The creatures were described as having bony plates on their heads that became burning hot, allowing the animals to bore through ice at high speed.

1995年愚人节，《发现》杂志公布，一位德高望重的、名叫Aprile Pazzo（意大利语：愚人节）的生物学家在南极洲发现了一种名叫热裸体钻冰虫的新物种。据介绍，这种生物头部的骨头能变得滚烫，所以可以高速的钻冰。

Noted British astronomer Patrick Moore announced on the radio in 1976 that at 9:47 am, a once-in-a-lifetime astronomical event, in which Pluto would pass behind Jupiter, would cause a gravitational alignment that would reduce the Earth's gravity. Moore told listeners that if they jumped in the air at the exact moment of the planetary alignment, they would experience a floating sensation. Hundreds of people called in to report feeling the sensation.

1976年愚人节，英国著名天文学家帕特里克•摩尔通过电台宣布，当天早上9时47分会出现一个百年一遇的天文现象，冥王星将从木星后面经过，由此而形成的引力组合将使地球的引力减弱。摩尔告诉听众，如果他们在经过的那一时刻跳起来，会有一种飘浮感。当时，数百人打电话去电台，称他们确实感到了那种“飘浮感”

In 1998, a newsletter titled New Mexicans for Science and Reason carried an article that the state of Alabama had voted to change the value of pi from 3.14159 to the "Biblical value" of 3.0.

1998年愚人节，新墨西哥人科学与推理组织的通讯上刊登的一篇文章中称，美国阿拉巴马州已投票决定，将圆周率值3.14159改为"圣经值"3.0。

The World's Greatest Swordsman

At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.

His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.

"Why are you so happy?" someone yelled. "You missed!"

"Ah," replied the swordsman, "you weren't watching very carefully. They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father."

世界上最伟大的击剑手

在一场世界最佳击剑手表演中，排名第三的击剑手上场了。一只苍蝇放了出来，剑划了一个弧，他将苍蝇劈成了两半。观众欢呼起来。紧接着排名第二的人将一只苍蝇切成了四半。现场一阵沉默，人们期盼着世界上最伟大的击剑手出场。

他的剑锋以一个巨大的弧线划了下来－－然而那只昆虫还在继续飞行!观众被惊呆了。最伟大的击剑手完全错过了他的目标，然而他还在微笑着。

“你为什么这么高兴？”有人嚷道，“你没击中!”

“啊，”剑手答道，“你刚才没有很仔细地看。苍蝇还活着，是的－－但他永远也做不成爸爸了。”

去沪江。

自己找